Psychotherapy Talk: A Woman's Nature

Updated: May 8, 2023

Last night I sat around a table with two other girlfriends, eating and catching up on different parts of life like career, self, and motherhood while we tended to the four littles divided among us. 

That’s one way to see it.

But taking a closer look, another perspective: Last night I sat around a table, sharing a meal with two girlfriends, while our four children hung on us. We tried balancing the needs of active, dependent littles and adult conversation. Often interrupted and distracted by littles' needs, we offered life updates about navigating and advancing stressful corporate careers; the tiresome balance of triaging energy to family and self; and how we’re growing right now. We spoke of what makes us come alive—to that which we’re called—and how we’re going after it. We talked about creative expression and that it's indispensable for our self-fulfillment. We communicated the sacrifices found in motherhood although having just started the journey. And we were open about how time in therapy is certifiably a safe way to sanity and personal betterment. 

A woman’s nature is dynamic, intuitive, life-pursuing, smart, determined, and inventive. Women can summarize this scene as simple conversation because we’re used to “catching up." But it’s pretty remarkable that we mamas can eat, parent, be mindful, engage, offer wisdom, learn, and hold space for others present…simultaneously. How often do we credit ourselves about how gifted we are in our abilities to juggle what’s on our mind, heart and environment in any given conversation; in any given moment?

I left that sweet friend’s house thankful for those two women and their commitment to mothering beside me, and their commitment to community. Whether aware of it or not, it required their whole self to show up and be present. The latter perspective above illustrates a woman's true nature while the former sells us short, something we often to do to ourselves. Did that "catch up" seem deeply profound in the moment? Not necessarily. But in afterthought there's more to "simple" conversations beneath the surface--you bring intricacy and dimension to every one of them. But do you get that? Mamas, you're magic: That brain of yours, that instinct, that spirit--giving them willingly, to countless things, regardless their complexities.

So what perspective will you choose to see of yourself and of your table conversations?

Xo.